登陆注册
25527900000046

第46章

I remained at Pasean until the end of September, and the last eleven nights of my stay were passed in the undisturbed possession of Lucie, who, secure in her mother's profound sleep, came to my room to enjoy in my arms the most delicious hours. The burning ardour of my love was increased by the abstinence to which I condemned myself, although Lucie did everything in her power to make me break through my determination. She could not fully enjoy the sweetness of the forbidden fruit unless I plucked it without reserve, and the effect produced by our constantly lying in each other's arms was too strong for a young girl to resist. She tried everything she could to deceive me, and to make me believe that I had already, and in reality, gathered the whole flower, but Bettina's lessons had been too efficient to allow me to go on a wrong scent, and I reached the end of my stay without yielding entirely to the temptation she so fondly threw in my way. I promised her to return in the spring; our farewell was tender and very sad, and I left her in a state of mind and of body which must have been the cause of her misfortunes, which, twenty years after, I had occasion to reproach myself with in Holland, and which will ever remain upon my conscience.

A few days after my return to Venice, I had fallen back into all my old habits, and resumed my courtship of Angela in the hope that I

would obtain from her, at least, as much as Lucie had granted to me.

A certain dread which to-day I can no longer trace in my nature, a sort of terror of the consequences which might have a blighting influence upon my future, prevented me from giving myself up to complete enjoyment. I do not know whether I have ever been a truly honest man, but I am fully aware that the feelings I fostered in my youth were by far more upright than those I have, as I lived on, forced myself to accept. A wicked philosophy throws down too many of these barriers which we call prejudices.

The two sisters who were sharing Angela's embroidery lessons were her intimate friends and the confidantes of all her secrets. I made their acquaintance, and found that they disapproved of her extreme reserve towards me. As I usually saw them with Angela and knew their intimacy with her, I would, when I happened to meet them alone, tell them all my sorrows, and, thinking only of my cruel sweetheart, I

never was conceited enough to propose that these young girls might fall in love with me; but I often ventured to speak to them with all the blazing inspiration which was burning in me--a liberty I would not have dared to take in the presence of her whom I loved. True love always begets reserve; we fear to be accused of exaggeration if we should give utterance to feelings inspired, by passion, and the modest lover, in his dread of saying too much, very often says too little.

The teacher of embroidery, an old bigot, who at first appeared not to mind the attachment I skewed for Angela, got tired at last of my too frequent visits, and mentioned them to the abbe, the uncle of my fair lady. He told me kindly one day that I ought not to call at that house so often, as my constant visits might be wrongly construed, and prove detrimental to the reputation of his niece. His words fell upon me like a thunder-bolt, but I mastered my feelings sufficiently to leave him without incurring any suspicion, and I promised to follow his good advice.

Three or four days afterwards, I paid a visit to the teacher of embroidery, and, to make her believe that my visit was only intended for her, I did not stop one instant near the young girls; yet I

contrived to slip in the hand of the eldest of the two sisters a note enclosing another for my dear Angela, in which I explained why I had been compelled to discontinue my visits, entreating her to devise some means by which I could enjoy the happiness of seeing her and of conversing with her. In my note to Nanette, I only begged her to give my letter to her friend, adding that I would see them again the day after the morrow, and that I trusted to her to find an opportunity for delivering me the answer. She managed it all very cleverly, and, when I renewed my visit two days afterwards, she gave me a letter without attracting the attention of anyone.

Nanette's letter enclosed a very short note from Angela, who, disliking letter-writing, merely advised me to follow, if I could, the plan proposed by her friend. Here is the copy of the letter written by Nanette, which I have always kept, as well as all other letters which I give in these Memoirs:

"There is nothing in the world, reverend sir, that I would not readily do for my friend. She visits at our house every holiday, has supper with us, and sleeps under our roof. I will suggest the best way for you to make the acquaintance of Madame Orio, our aunt; but, if you obtain an introduction to her, you must be very careful not to let her suspect your preference for Angela, for our aunt would certainly object to her house being made a place of rendezvous to facilitate your interviews with a stranger to her family. Now for the plan I propose, and in the execution of which I will give you every assistance in my power. Madame Orio, although a woman of good station in life, is not wealthy, and she wishes to have her name entered on the list of noble widows who receive the bounties bestowed by the Confraternity of the Holy Sacrament, of which M. de Malipiero is president. Last Sunday, Angela mentioned that you are in the good graces of that nobleman, and that the best way to obtain his patronage would be to ask you to entreat it in her behalf. The foolish girl added that you were smitten with me, that all your visits to our mistress of embroidery were made for my special benefit and for the sake of entertaining me, and that I would find it a very easy task to interest you in her favour. My aunt answered that, as you are a priest, there was no fear of any harm, and she told me to write to you with an invitation to call on her; I refused. The procurator Rosa, who is a great favourite of my aunt's, was present;

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 武林客栈:月阙卷

    武林客栈:月阙卷

    从《卷舞天下》到《摘叶飞花》,都体现了非烟MM的巧思灵慧。犹如还珠楼主养慧于巴山蜀水,非烟MM亦得其慧心灵性于山水荒野之间。她追求的不是大漠风烟的雄犷,而是山重水复的曲折。更妙的是,她亦非常善于制造断了线头的悬念,使人悬望着客栈中的风云传奇。
  • 曼珠沙华:彼岸如血

    曼珠沙华:彼岸如血

    佛说:前世的孽,今生来偿。奈何桥头,孟婆端着热汤;三生石旁,有醒悟的灵魂在默然哭泣;忘川河中,一个个执意的灵魂正在受苦······彼岸花代表死亡的爱恋。那一地的彼岸如血,铺成了火照之路······执迷不悟的人啊,你还在等待些什么?女主黎兮诺因为失恋,不堪生活的压力,投海自杀。死后,她来到了死后世界——黄泉。在这里,人们要选择喝下醪酒或是热汤。之后,他们会投胎转世,重新做人。黎兮诺选择了等待爱人。在忘川河中,她受尽苦难,经历了许多匪夷所思的事件。最后,她才发现,原来,一切,都源于那件事······本部作品,描写了死后的世界,情节环环相扣。如有雷同,纯属巧合。内容全部为沫离殇花d原创!谢谢支持!
  • 普济本事方

    普济本事方

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 往生陵

    往生陵

    墓,埋葬死人的地方。陵,一切真相的根源。所有人冥冥中都在寻找着什么......宿命,也许只是上天的一场安排......我在往生陵等你,你......敢来吗?当白河踏进西安大墓的那一刻,宿命与轮回正式开启。走过了繁华,蓦然回首,故事的结局居然是你!
  • 打工的舰娘

    打工的舰娘

    “提督,没有弹药了。”昆明抬头看着站在窗口的提督道。“昆明啊,昨天不是刚给你补给么?”提督看着正在吃铝的昆明道。那些啊,上午打演习的时候全部发射了。“昆明笑嘻嘻的伸出手道,”提督,你忍心自己的舰娘饿肚子么?“然后,提督就从窗口跳下……
  • 最后的军礼

    最后的军礼

    这一句兄弟我希望是永远,我的后背永远是你,不抛弃,不放弃!
  • 恶魔校草真霸道:蜜爱99次

    恶魔校草真霸道:蜜爱99次

    雪儿刚回国,就误惹恶魔。丢了初吻不说,还遭到恶魔的调戏。不料,转到了樱珞学院。与恶魔再次相遇。撞坏了恶魔的车。恶魔故意刁难。当着全校女生再次强吻雪儿,因此她成为了全校女生的公敌。正因为一次次的刁难,一次次的相遇。这才使雪儿和韩逸辰有过上了幸福的生活。
  • 风景依稀似经年

    风景依稀似经年

    民国的腥风血雨和儿女情长
  • 韩娱律动

    韩娱律动

    主人公通过自己一步步的努力,终于在充满荆棘的偶像道路上走得更远,更成功
  • 一人一狗闹江湖

    一人一狗闹江湖

    无望少年,插科打诨,血雨腥风,鏖战江湖。三界融合后,人类开始真武双修。真即是修真,又称修仙,武即是修武,又称武侠。所以,真武是介于武侠和修仙之间一种职业,也可以说是将武侠和修仙结合的一种修炼方法。真武人多以武道榜为生,所以,不管你是高手还是新人,只要你想从武道榜获得奖金,就必须从真武学院开始。